it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
