sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
