There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Success! We fucked roommates!
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