Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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