i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
