Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize