How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
that's an acceptable place to lick
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
