i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
