Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
