Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
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the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
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So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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