i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
