Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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