oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
