Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I woke up under a house in Key West
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