Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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