Nicole vs. Life
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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