love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
