you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize