using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Randomize
