how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
