we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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