I need help removing her.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
