this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
farters have to be the big spoon...
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
