just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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