I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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