dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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