Capitaan dildo arrescate!
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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