Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
