My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
