He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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