Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize