i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
