Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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