goodnight i made you a song goodbye
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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