Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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