Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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