Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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