ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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