put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
