That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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