Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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