What did we do last night that was yellow?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
