sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
