I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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