oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
