2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
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I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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