my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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