fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
