So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Alive.
So much puke
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
