I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize