dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Text me some of your sweat
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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